Social Media Cannot Make You Beautiful

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My friends, family members, and relatives accuse me time and again that I am (kind of) un-social. And they’re right in a sense.

You see, I usually do not attend parties, though people keep inviting me.

I have a professional acquaintance from a radio station I had worked for – that guy is a DJ. He keeps organising shows in clubs, five-star hotels, and farmhouses.

Quite often he insists, “Come on, Avdhesh bhai, the party is free for you. I’ll send you the passes; please come.”

No, thanks.

Even if you pay me to attend any such function or party, I’ll not go. I don’t like loud noise and parties. That’s not my cup of tea.

The Pressure to Socialise

Just because most of the people are socialising doesn’t mean you also need to do the same. (Individuality, anyone?)

Imagine a conversation over the phone:

You’re speaking into a computer, and the other person, too, is talking into a machine. Only the voices are travelling via optical fibres. There’s nothing human in it – you cannot experience a person over the phone (even though you can see his or her face via video calling).

Nothing can take the place of face-to-face human interaction – no technology can replace it, no matter how sophisticated the technology may get in future.

Now, don’t think that I don’t have a phone. I do. But I don’t chatter over it. I’d instead meet my friends in person for a face-to-face talk.

I prefer looking into people’s eyes, watch them smiling or making faces, or whatever. I like to experience socialising in its totality.

Yes, I do use my phone – to pass on information, and that’s it. Mind you; phones were not invented for “talking.”

Indians are Generous (At Least When it Comes to Giving Advice)

Here’s a glimpse of the typical unsolicited advice I receive almost every day.

“You’re not on Whatsapp? Are you serious?” (No, I am Avdhesh 🙂 ).

“You know what, you should be more active on Facebook.”

“You’re a professional, and you’re not on LinkedIn. Dude, what’s wrong with you?”

Well, I do have a Facebook page, and I use it to communicate with the readers of this blog. But I rarely use my Facebook personal account. What’s there to use?

Your Life is Private. How About Keeping it That Way?

What you did last evening is none of my business, and likewise, you should not be concerned about what I did.

I almost always fail to understand:

  • Why should I upload pictures of my trip to that mall?
  • Do you want to know where did I go for dinner last night, why?
  • Why should I share ‘useful life hacks’ that are nothing but gimmicks?
  • Am I a spy drone – photographing my life and uploading the pictures to my bosses sitting on my Facebook timeline?
  • Why are you so interested in my life? If I enjoyed a movie with my wife, it’s between us. Why would I upload pictures of us munching on popcorn or sipping soda? Is it my life or national archives?

You see people, it’s my life, and I do get offended when you guys try to sneak in.

“Oh! So, you’re a privacy freak.”

You bet I am!

My philosophy is simple. Don’t sneak into others’ lives and don’t let others sneak into yours. Period.

Why Are You So Interested in Others’ Lives?

By the way, why are you so interested in what’s happening around you?


Or because your life is not exciting enough?

Don’t you think that Instead of uploading photos to social media, you need to work on yourself?

Some people update Facebook statuses thrice a day (it’s true). Does that mean they are social? No, it means they don’t have anything worth doing.

I know a couple who keeps uploading their pictures on social media.

If they just sipped tea, people must know. They stopped by a highway restaurant; the people have a right to know. If they just felt romantic in each other’s arms, everybody must know.

No sir! The nation does not want to know. Keep your private life private, and instead, do something worthwhile.

  • Go for a jog
  • Tend your plants. If you don’t have plants, get some
  • Volunteer for a cause
  • Clean your street
  • Learn a new skill
  • Complete your half-finished projects

Do something that can make your life interesting – for you.

There are a thousand things you can do to make your life worth living and believe me, uploading a selfie on Facebook is indeed not one of them.

Do something because you want to do it. And not because you needed a selfie with that sick person to advertise to the world that you just donated him a blanket.

Should You Stop Sharing?

Of course not! Sharing makes life worth living. But you must ask yourself if what you’re doing is really sharing or just self-gratification?

How many times have you shared something on social media that was useful? And was that even yours? Had you created that? Or had you shared something somebody had shared on your timeline?

Sharing can be beautiful if you’ve created something – a poem, a recipe, a song, a blog post, or a creative way to solve a problem.

The Real Reason Behind Uploading Pictures on Social Media

You upload your pictures expecting people to comment. And say what?

That you’re looking great – that you’re looking beautiful – isn’t it?

The reason is, even you’re not sure of your beauty. Somewhere deep down, you have this need to get validated by other people. And who are these people? They are no different. They too, “share” on social media so they can get some validation from others.

If you genuinely want to become more beautiful than you currently are, do something about it. Social media probably cannot do it for you.

Read more:

Social Media. Sharing. Creativity

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Avdhesh Tondak is a blogger on a mission: to cut the crap and give the readers what they want (and deserve)—personal development articles in plain English. Connect with him on facebook and twitter.